


One fuck in Belize and one in Oceanside

by Iresposts



Series: Belize [2]
Category: Animal Kingdom (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 10:38:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16084406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iresposts/pseuds/Iresposts
Summary: Deran and Adrian’s first time fucking in Belize, and Deran dealing with Adrian dumping him in 0107.





	One fuck in Belize and one in Oceanside

**Author's Note:**

> Betaed adeptly by @allthehearteyes and @dixiethumbelina

_Adrian (Belize)_

_Some days later_

Adrian was sitting in the room’s only chair while Deran lounged on the bed. Adrian’s new room at the hostel was tiny, so they were still close. He tried to keep the shock off his face as Deran laughing told him of his first time. He felt cold as Deran continued, “So yeah, Craig was outside the men’s room at the truck stop. Smurf was yelling at Baz to shut the fuck up, I think, we were all cranky and we didn’t know why the fuck Smurf thought we needed a beach holiday anyway? We live in Oceanside! I was there taking a piss and then this cock comes out of nowhere. I hadn’t even seen the hole. I’m thinking that it couldn’t be true, like what I’ve been imagining like in porn, and you,” Deran flicked a glance at Adrian, “and the guy from the Solo Surf movie, but there it was.” Deran smiled at Adrian like it was normal what he was saying.

This was his fault. Why hadn’t Adrian realized all of this? He tried to do the math with how old Deran had to have been that summer break and winced.

Deran reached out to touch Adrian’s leg, and without meaning to Adrian recoiled. Adrian could immediately see the hurt in Deran. Because he’d been hurt so many times, for Adrian for even one moment to unconsciously suggest he didn’t want him threw Deran into a tailspin. It seemed for Deran being wanted and used via sex was all he knew of affection.

Adrian grasped Deran’s hand and rubbed his palm before tracing the lines there. Which one was the heart line? He could tell that Deran wanted him, but was his heart involved? Adrian didn’t really want this, to fuck things up with his best friend with sex. But it was done for the moment, and Adrian wouldn’t, no  _couldn’t_ , leave him like this, open, raw and vulnerable.

Adrian continued to trace the lines on Deran’s palm, gently holding it. Deran wasn’t content with that so he tugged at Adrian’s hand and pulled and then they were on the bed together, staring at each other’s mouths, close enough to kiss.

When it happened it was gentle, sweet and everything that had been missing from Deran’s story. Adrian wanted to cry for Deran, but his friend wouldn’t accept his sympathy. So, he tried to soothe and say he was sorry with his touches, which Deran after only a few days together now accepted as his right. As usual the kiss didn’t remain sweet for very long, and then they were at it again, tearing at each other’s clothes. Adrian hadn’t quite worked it out at the beginning, but now he knew that their sex was always going to be passionate to the point of violence. It was all Deran knew, and if he were being honest, he loved it too. That not-quite-there danger of fucking a dangerous man.

They ended up with Deran on top, ass resting near Adrian’s dick, both breathing heavily.

“Fuck me. I want it,” said Deran, and his eyes pinned Adrian to the bed. From what he’d seen Deran needed to be in charge of the fucking for it to work for him, unless he was giving head, and even then, he led. Adrian was hesitant. Deran needed the illusion of control and being fucked wasn’t going to mesh with that, so…

“No man, fuck me, alright?” Adrian offered himself up instead. Deran didn’t need a second invitation. Optimistically and without discussing it they’d both individually bought lube, so it was easy enough to reach over and grab one of the plastic bags from the bedside table. Adrian did himself while Deran put the condom on. He probably got too much, but it couldn’t hurt. The stuff had kind of gushed out of the bottle. Adrian had bottomed once before, and it hadn’t been that great, but still enjoyable so he knew what to expect. All he knew for this time was that he needed to see Deran’s face to make sure he was OK with it.

Adrian thought Deran looked nervous, so he didn’t let himself think about it too hard. He pulled Deran further down the bed and sat on his stomach before he grabbed Deran’s cock, lined it up and sank down.

“Oh fuck,” Deran gasped.

Adrian started to move, cautiously at first before finding his rhythm. Deran was trying to help by thrusting up but failing because Adrian outweighed him. Adrian liked it though, it meant that Deran was into it. He leaned forward and there it was, that spot. Adrian felt his vision darkening, because Deran’s cock was nailing it every single time. Adrian could feel sweat pop out everywhere as he worked hard riding him. Deran meanwhile was starting to moan, cheeks red, hair coming out of the loose bun. Adrian paused and pulled the rubber band all the way off, and then just looked at Deran, dark blond hair around his face like a halo.

“What the fuck, you stopped for that?” said Deran, annoyance clear.

“What can I say? I fucking love your hair,” said Adrian raising his body up before slamming it down onto Deran’s cock. Deran gasped. Then Adrian changed his mind, so without grace he slumped down on Deran’s chest, an angle that made Deran pop out of his ass. Deran groaned, frustration clear. “The fuck man?” But Adrian wanted this, to ride Deran and pull on that gorgeous hair. He had a feeling that Deran would love it too, considering he liked it rough. He slid Deran’s cock into his loosened ass and resumed the motion, hands now buried in Deran’s hair and then there were no more words, just the beat and slap of their bodies meeting in the small room. He yanked Deran’s hair too, and every time he did Deran let loose a pained moan.

Adrian was nearly there, his balls tightening, ready to blow. Deran was panting with every thrust, and Adrian figured that he didn’t have much longer either. He kept going, body getting tighter and warmer. Nearly there, he was so damn close. Deran had his hands on Adrian’s hips now, forcing him down onto his cock faster and harder. There would be hand shaped bruises tomorrow. Adrian loved it, and then he had no more time and he was coming all over himself and Deran. He went limp on Deran’s chest.

“Fuck Adrian. Could I finish, please?” Adrian nodded limply. He was already starting to get a bit sensitive. Deran grabbed Adrian’s butt and, while still in him, flipped him over. It took only a few more thrusts and then he came, groaning. He pulled out, chucked the used condom into the trash and wiped Adrian’s come off them with a handful of tissues before moving to lie beside him. They were both breathing hard, totally wiped. They lay there in silence enjoying the fucked-out feeling.

“It was pretty hilarious because it was so fucking unexpected, you know? I sucked the dude off, and that was my first time,” Deran finished. It took Adrian a while to process through the post orgasm fog. The truckstop story, holy Jesus.

His friend was so fucked up and the sad bit was he didn’t even realize it himself.

_Deran (Oceanside)_

Everything was blurry. Deran could feel the ugly sobs trapped in his chest, ready to burst. He wasn’t sure he believed it –  _You can’t make me feel something I don’t_  – but whether he believed them or not, Adrian had meant them to hurt. Deran clenched his jaw. But Deran hadn’t asked about Adrian’s  _feelings_. All he’d wanted was the simplicity of Belize, that time with Adrian where they just  _were._ He’d wanted it to be OK. Not even fucking good, just OK. Why couldn’t Adrian understand?

He shakily tapped one from the packet of reds and lit up, and it was relief just for a moment from the pain in his chest. Deran felt the tears return but he held them back with sheer willpower. He remembered crying in Smurf’s lap after the guard had died, and he wanted that comfort again desperately. He wanted his mom to fix it for him like she always did. But this wasn’t something Smurf could fix. Adrian was right. This was hopeless and shameful and nothing he wanted his mom to see.

So, he’d try his other solution, one that that had worked for him since he was a teenager, starting at that truck stop, the last one on the PCH before Oceanside. It was what he’d sought all those times he’d gone ‘surfing’ at stupid hours of the day, leaving Craig behind. It was an ease – like the nicotine – which stopped the pain momentarily. He finished his cigarette and tossed it into the trash.

He found the right bathroom block, second one before the parking lot. It was on the tiny beach park by the creek. It was the most popular glory hole in Oceanside. There were cars parked nearby, a good sign that it was going to be a busy evening. He’d get it tonight. He went in and made for the last stall, avoiding the stinking urinal. He placed his folded hoodie near the hole in the wall. It was at an awkward height, which he knew from experience. The opening would always be fixed up, but then someone would drill the hole again. He just wished that someone would make it lower.

Even before he’d positioned himself, his view was blocked by a cock. Perfect. He got ready to lap. Fuck Adrian anyway, or rather not fuck Adrian. He put his mouth around it but felt a sob escape around the hot dick. The guy didn’t care, just kept thrusting. Soon after he came into Deran’s mouth, with some of it getting on his cheek. He’d obviously misjudged how close the guy had been. After the third one Deran was starting to tire, jaw aching when another cock was pushed through the hole. 

He looked at it for a moment before he made up his mind. It would do. Nice and straight and hard. It would do. Today for the first time, he needed to have something inside him to deal with the hurt. Deran had had enough of feeling empty. Adrian—he cut the thought off brutally, but his mind refused to cooperate. Adrian had never fucked him. Not after he’d heard about Deran’s sexual history.

He got off his knees and unlocked the door and went outside. He caught his eye in the stainless-steel sheet that worked for a mirror. He smiled at his reflection, and resentment stirred. Whatever. Adrian wasn’t here because Adrian had never felt anything for him. So, what? He’d thought that Adrian needed him and needed the sex that they had. For Deran it was as important to him as breathing. But obviously not for Adrian. Deran felt it in his chest again, that choking feeling when a wave pinned him and all he could do was to ride it out.

He couldn’t explain it. No matter how awesome the sex was between them sometimes Deran just wanted to be fucked, like tonight. He wanted to be used. He wanted to be spat on, and kicked and hurt, because that’s how he felt about his body and his sick desires. It turned him on too, like crazy.

He didn’t even care right now that the random guy would see him, for once the paranoia was eclipsed by sheer desperation and want. He knocked on the stall next to him. “Fuck me man?” he shaped the question and it was out. The door opened.

A few minutes later he’d come, but it hadn’t been gentle. Deran hadn’t prepared thinking that it would be Adrian in his bedroom, so he’d only brought lubed condoms, not actual lube. The man left and Deran tiredly mopped up his ass. He wasn’t surprised to see a little blood. He felt better though, less upset and angry about those cutting words. Alright, so he was a little disappointed that Adrian wasn’t into it anymore, but he would always have this.

Deran smiled again, but this time it was genuine.


End file.
